HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Cheers to 2011! Stay tuned for more fun and exciting posts this year!

DRAGON COFFEE BREATH

Well, the resulting 'B*tch' can also stem from the poor service one might receive at Starbucks. Happy New Year to our dear friends at Bluntcard.com for the smiles throughout 2010. The first thing being served following our New Year's Eve celebration is a hot cup 'o Java! Cheers!

AIR BATH

It's the TOTO Neorest Air Bath

Ok gentlemen, I know what you're thinking ... When was the last time you took a bath, (unless it was a romantic tub session with your significant other). In all honesty, I am a shower guy, but this sleek bath from TOTO warrants some attention heading into the New Year. With almost as many bells and whistles as the finest luxury automobile, it's hard to keep from getting naked and stepping into the Air Bath (not alone of course). Don't forget the scented candles, soothing music and a lovely bottle of Pinot Noir to enhance the experience... not that this bathing experience needs any form of enhancement! Happy New Year!

FIRE IN THE HOLE!

The Sleek Audio SA7 earphones are built to withstand almost anything, including combat. Just in case you drive a tank or are firing your weapon on the run, these beauties pack a punch and are the preferred headphones by several military officers. The rugged Sleek Audio SA7's are constructed with milled aluminum and silicone, and then capped off in carbon fiber for extra protection. Think of them as a Kevlar vest for your ears. The SA7s are held together with Titanium screws to ensure they keep pumping out the beats in even the most strenuous of situations. They feature a pretty sweet wireless option or can be used on the cord. If they muffle the sounds of combat, they certainly will drown out the sound of that screaming baby in the airplane. Retail for US$400. (We frown upon anyone listening to Justin Bieber with these killer headphones.)

THE ROLLS-ROYCE OF TEQUILA

This tequila is smoother than silk.

Diamante retails for around US139 in the USA, and is well worth the investment.

Happy Holidays! On Christmas day I was fortunate enough to share a few shots of this ultra-premium tequila. Patrón is the equivalent to a tequila training bra compared to this one! I would rate the contents of this bottle to be as smooth as Fiji Water, but with a slight tequila aroma... No salt or lemon/lime required. Enjoy chilled. Now that's SMOOTH!

From 7,500 feet above sea level, in ‘the purest corner’ of Mexico – the highlands of Purisima del Rincon – comes a tequila that is redefining luxury in terms of the South American drink. DeLeón’s Diamante is their blanco tequila & so far it’s earned quite a reputation for itself in the premium alcohol field. Reposado is their ultra smooth offering, perfect for your cocktail evenings by the poolside. Diamante retails at around US$139, with Reposado going for $129 a bottle.The family-owned distillery will be releasing Añejo later this year & there’s a lot of buzz about the new kind on the block: the brew is apparently aged in Sauternes wine barrels from premium wine-makers. Perfect for the New Years bash ya'll!

IT"S TIME TO FIGHT BACK

Penguins are joining the fight against global warming!

It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life. The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintaining a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life. Join the fight against global warming!

Cartier Winter Tale

Louis Francious Cartier started Cartier Jewelry back in 1847. He used to work in the workshop in Paris, France, before taking it over. The first Cartier item was sold in 1856 to the niece of Napoleon I, named Princess Mathilde. Empress Egenie became a customer in 1859 and things went forward from there for Cartier Jewelry, also moving house to Boulevard des Italiens. In 1888 Cartier Jewelry launched their first range of watches for ladies.

SHE'S A THING OF BEAUTY

GO AHEAD, CHECK MY BAG

JanSport bags allow for faster airport security screening, which means less time with TSA.

DELIVERING A SHOCK

ATTENTION LADIES: Do NOT mistake this for your slim-fit easy glide, or you will be twitching from 50,000 volts.

The ancient Egyptians invented the first disposable tampon that was made from softened papyrus. The ancient Greeks came up with the idea to wrap lint around a small piece of wood to stop the unwanted monthly flow. Ok, enough with the history lesson. Moving onto present day, the female hygeine unit known as the tampon needs no introduction, and is primarily used to absorb the flow of bodily fluid. It's also a must-have in any rugged outdoorsmen survival kit, (ask Bear Grylls) plus serves as a great firestarter when in a wet survival situation. Taking self defense into your own hands is the way to go, the aptly named, ‘Pink Stinger’ is a stun gun designed as a tampon, and can deliver a whopping 50,000 volts to any attacker. This tampon taser can be used directly or shot at a target up to 4-meters away. This will make you think twice when you hear a woman say, ‘I gotta change my tampon.’ Be sure not to get on your woman’s bad side. I wonder what the kind bastards at the TSA would do if they found this in your purse? We are quite certain 'The Pink Stinger' is on the TSA prohibited list. 

HANDS OFF MY JUNK

The officially register logo of the TSA

THE NEW FACE OF JAGUAR

The front grille of the new Jaguar XF, and yes it does have a mean growl.

The new Jaguar XF speaks volumes when it comes to style. It's more than just another beautiful, fast car. It adds a new dimension of personal enjoyment. On the exterior, it resembles a muscled up coupe, but once inside, there is enough space for five adults. Jaguar knows that the heart of the car is a great engine; the XF offers two, a supercharged 420 hp, 4.2-liter and a 240 hp, 3.0-liter V6. Take a test drive today.

F*CK GUN CONTROL

Hey man! Hands off my revolver, oh , wait, they are only my cuff-links.

We love guns... when handled properly and in the hands of responsible, good-hearted individuals. These little Colt Revolver Cuff-links are locked and loaded! Made entirely out of sterling silver, they come complete with hand-carved wooden handles for that authentic look. These unique cuff-links are sure to impress your friends. We do not advise wearing them on any domestic flight in the USA, because TSA will be all over your ass. (Bullets sold separately).

EVERYONE LOVES BUBBLE WRAP

The back of the 'Bubble Wrap' neck tie.  The perfect fashion accessory for those working at Mailboxes Etc.

These ties will be off the charts as soon as they make the 'skinny tie' for Seacrest and Bieber.

How many of your love to snap and pop bubble wrap? I think most everyone finds this theraputic. Now you can get your bubble-popping fix in the form of a stylish ‘Bubble Wrap’ neck tie. It does sound a bit tacky, but it integrates the blistered material to offer the tie a futuristic and borderline couture feel. The wrap is concealed in the back of the tie so you can pop the bubbles on a whim. It’s probably best not to let the secret outta the bag, cuz you may have a colleague grab the tie and pop all the fun. 

GREAT BONE STRUCTURE

The stiletto heels are a nice touch.

It's that time of year again when people are rushing around doing their holiday shopping. One of the biggest questions every holiday season is, "What to get the man that has everything?" Well look no further. This calendar has taken the term 'pin-up' to a whole new level. We doubt you will see this in your physicians office, but the calendar is creative, provocative, and proves once again that beauty is only skin deep. (Or the model was so damn ugly, the only way to show her beauty was through an x-ray.) Maybe TSA will have its own x-ray scan calendar out by mid-December, who knows. Every month of the year is depicted with a different position and will certainly give some laughs throughout 2011, especially on Halloween.

PROTECT THE ELEPHANTS

What's one of the favorite animals in the wild, plus a kid fave at the zoo and circus? It's the Dumbo-eared elephants eating peanuts. This intelligent land mammal takes center stage in this peanut advertisement. At first glance this image may resemble something from an intense mating scene on Animal Planet. Upon closer inspection, you will actually digest the fact the larger elephant is indeed administering the Heimlich Maneuver to prevent the smaller elephant from choking on a peanut. First these large herbivores have to worry about human intrusion and poaching, now they have to worry about a peanut so big, it poses a choke hazard. A very creative add from our friends at Kaya King's Jumbo Peanut.

WHO FRIED THE CHEESE?

Don't you just hate it when your cheese tries to electrocute itself... It's called fried cheese.

KISS ME STUPID

Sometimes all you want is a f*cking kiss to make things better.